Posts Tagged ‘Humor’

This is the year of the Metal Rabbit, and I think this cute silver-plated bank is an adorable way to mark the occasion.

Silver Rabbit Bank

May 2011 be prosperous for everyone!  All I know is it has to be good when the mascot is this cute:

Angora Rabbit

The Blah Blah Blahger has a funny post about an embarrassing moment involving fuzzy “adult” handcuffs.  I, too, have an embarrassing story involving handcuffs, but they weren’t the fuzzy “novelty” kind.  They were real, police-issue handcuffs.  First, you need to know some background.

In my day, I was part of the punk scene.  I had weird hair dyed numerous colors: partially shaved, mohawk-esque, with blue streaks or pink streaks.  I often dyed my naturally auburn hair black.  I had a nose piercing before nose rings were cool and mainstream, and let’s not forget my first tattoo at the tender age of 14.  I also dressed in odd outfits mainly purchased at thrift stores or fashioned with homemade things.  In the 80s, I was a bizarre combination of Duckie from Pretty in Pink (that’s a movie) and Sid Vicious from the Sex Pistols (that’s a punk band):

Duckie from "Pretty in Pink"

Sid Vicious of Sex Pistols

Yeah.  I know.  I’m a redheaded chick, and I identified more with two dudes from the 80s than the quintessential 80s redhead, Molly Ringwald. I’ve never really been the prom queen or pink-princess type of girl.

Anyway, while you’re still trying to wrap your head around that, let’s get back to my clothes.  One of my favorite items was a studded handcuff belt with a real pair of police-issue handcuffs.  I loved that belt.  I wore it often.

Studded Handcuff Belt

For some reason which defies logic, I kept the handcuffs long after I had retired my punk look and the studded belt.  The cuffs made the trip with me to Oklahoma for my research post there, and the cuffs remained hidden in my closet, forgotten, until my Mom, one of her friends, and the friend’s grandchild came to visit me.  While we were talking in my living room, the grandchild was playing in my bedroom.  She found the handcuffs, and before I could say “NO!” she snapped one cuff on her wrist and one on my Mom’s friend’s wrist.  The friend turned to look at me and said, “You have the key, right?”  Sadly, I informed her that I did not have the key.

That’s when things get funny.  Obviously, the little girl easily slipped her wrist out of the cuff because it was too big for her.  Her Grandma, on the other hand, was stuck.  We tried for an hour or more to pick the lock before giving up and calling the cops.  We very calmly explained the situation, and they said they would see what they could do.  Another hour passed, and we hadn’t heard from the cops.  I called them back, and the person who answered said, “Oh!  Really?  I thought that was a prank call!  You really have someone trapped in handcuffs?  We’ll send an officer right away.”  Hey, it was a small town.  I’m guessing that call was the most interesting thing going on that night in Stillwater, OK.

A very nice, very cute young cop arrived 20 minutes later.  He was able to unlock the cuffs with a key, and all was well.  He grinned at me the whole time, though, and he gave me his phone number when he left that night.   No, I didn’t go out with him, but I giggle every time I think about the fact that a cop thought it was a good idea to flirt with a kinky girl who had handcuffs and no key.   I wonder if he’s still out there, looking for his perverted soul mate.